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Dusty:Starlight:Culture



News Fakers; Adventures in South African Planning
2004-07-15   12:21 a.m.

So let me get this straight: if we have a "terrorist attack" on or near our presidential election day, we'll "postpone it", which didn't even happen during the American Civil War. Did I get that right?

The news/media is talking and talking and talking about these "unconfirmed what-ifs" as if they're realities and definites. I've literally heard the same non-descript, repetitive, circular speech seven times, ten different ways.

Typical sensationalism, but with a Bushified agenda-twist: I notice in talking to people here and there that the media is doing a good job of scaring people into believing something will happen on or near election day - especially since Tom Ridge et al keep harping on that "they want to disrupt our democratic process" line. (What a creative interpretation of the "Death to America!" chatter! Carpe Diem, gentlemen. What wonderful opportunists you are.)

If people are scared, they'll stay away from the polls. I'm just waiting for the news to declare: "The terrorists are targeting URBAN AREAS! Particularly in the [liberal] NORTH-EAST. It's best to STAY INDOORS! We'll have to IMPOSE A CURFEW!" Yes, that elementary school/podunk town hall where you do your voting will most surely be bombed by terrorists.

doi.

But why should people think differently if the government tells them not to? Why shouldn't they be scared if they hear inflated, melodramatic warnings from the mouths of important men?

Though many of us are rightfully skeptical about the timing of all these ("Oh no - Kerry is teaming with EDWARDS? The hottie with that appealing twang that will draw Southern votes away from us? Oh, and that awful MOORE film is drawing so much at the box-office! Quick! Ridge! DO SOMETHING! By TOMORROW!") say-nothing announcements, many people still believe our government would never lie about something so serious.

Wouldn't it be nice if that were true?

Sheesh. This time, they won't even have to set up fake police road-blocks in Florida to keep people - particularly minority, liberal-voting people - from the polls. Instead, the hysterical media will make sure those people will be terrified to leave their homes by the time November rolls around.

This isn't even clever, and it's the most downright insulting thing to happen yet. How close can we come to a totalitarian state before states start to defect from the Union?

Sigh.

And while I'm on it about being pissy: ten bucks says this Kenneth Lay gets off without any jail time. His friendship with W. makes me suspicious of how this trial will be handled. I am writing this down now so I can say "I'm not surprised" and tone down the rage I feel will come after the trial is over.

But oh yes, let's send Martha Stewart to jail. She lied and did a bad thing. Ok, so many people do that bad thing and get mini-punishments, but she is a woman, not to mention a bitch, and we cannot have someone like THAT getting POWERFUL or running her own MEGA-CORPORATION.

Martha Stewart, to the best of my knowledge, is NOT "buddies" with George W. Bush. Therefore, she does not stand a chance. There is no good-ol' boy network benefiting her, no. There's just the one that wants to make an example of her, because women are for crying and having babies, not for creating empires and banking millions of dollars.

I wonder if Darth-Cheney dropped his Enron shares right before the company tanked?

Lay hurt people. Thousands were laid off, thousands of workers' retirement funds were reduced to nothing. Martha tried to save a couple thousand, albeit dishonestly. But who will be playing golf next year at some Bush family vacation home? I'll give you a hint: it isn't the one known for their fabulous country cranberry-nut bread and decorative homemade candle creations.

Maybe I'll be wrong. Maybe I'll find myself doing the Stewie-from-family-guy "VICTORY IS MINE!" voice to the news of a fair sentencing reflective of the crime. I did that voice today when the marriage-amendment nonsense was shut-down. And believe me, I didn't expect that to happen either.

Small victories impede my growing paranoia. Hey, whatever helps.

Speaking of paranoia, what to do with five days in Jo'berg has been the funnest question yet.

We thought: Soweto. Nelson Mandela's former home, Desmond Tutu's current one. Pump some money into an otherwise greatly impoverished part of South Africa. But then, the Guardian headline today: "Evictions Cause Tension in Soweto: Violence Errupts". Angry community members marched in protest of unfair evictions, but police stopped the march by spraying tear gas and shooting rubber bullets. The community responded by throwing stones. One protester who was hospitalized declared: "We will not stop or give up". I'm with you, brother, but I can't run real fast in these shoes.

Take Two: Pretoria. Current capital, tons of music performances, Museum Africa, close to Lion Sanctuary boasting visitors' option of cuddling baby lions. But last week's headline in The Mail: "Prisoners on the Run in Pretoria". This particular GROUP, in fact, "made off with an official name list, leaving police and Correctional Services unable to determine who, and how many, had escaped."

WOW!

Apparently, this is not a rare occurrence. From the article: "A total of 3 260 suspects escaped from police custody between April 2002 and March 2003, an average of 272 per month." Man, there's nothing scarier than a completely ineffective, joke-of-a-police force. Kind of makes me nostalgic for Ghana, with its AK47-clad cops guarding the ATMs. Sigh.

So what now? To Swaziland? To Durban? To the Drakensberg? Stay put at the hostel (did I mention there's a pool?) in Rosebank? Extend in Budapest, if KLM doesn't charge us a million dollars to change our tickets? We need to be back in Jo'berg to meet the group in Kruger NP by August 2nd. One would think since the distance between Jo'berg and other points of interest is relatively small and accessible by bus, mini-bus taxi, and train, that traveling around and getting out of (and then back to) Jo'berg would be simple. This is Africa, though, after all, and at least this time around we know that we can EXPECT to get stuck somewhere for days because no one feels like driving "until tomorrow" (and tomorrow and tomorrow). So do we risk not meeting our overland pickup? Could we possibly catch up to them in Zam or Kruger if we did get stuck in Swaziland, Durban, or Cape Town? Most likely no - it's not as if we can text message someone's cell and say "Where are you?...Oh! Ok, be there soon!".

This is, if you can believe it, the fun part. I'll take my lucky necklace and see what happens.

It's sleepy time right now.

xo